Words from Someone Who Really Loves Her God

I ranted about facebook friending not meaning you were going to marry the person who friended you. Or believe everything that person stood for. This is a passive aggressive forward from a person who I try not to talk to ever.

"To be honest Fred, both you and Sappho have been incredibly deceived. You have both mix- (OK, what is this supposed to say? Mixed it up? Mix and matched our clothes?)

You have abandoned the truth of scripture and have bought into a multitude of lies from the enemy. I am extremely saddened by what I have read in your profile and very concerned for your soul. Sappho has also forsaken the truth of scripture in favor of a "user friendly" version that completely denies everything that the Bible teaches about morality. (Oh, yeah, and you are covering your head as a sign of submission, not speaking in church, not eating seafood, not walking your ass on the Sabbath.) The very disturbing thing about it is how you both believe that you are in the Christian faith. You have both accepted a different gospel and are following a false Jesus.

I really resisted saying this to you (yeah, for about 5 minutes) but I feel I have no choice if I am to be faithful to the teaching of Scripture. (My brother, and her husband) has tried several times to appeal to Sappho and she is not able to hear the truth anymore.

I pray that God will grant you repentance, but I cannot pretend that your beliefs line up with the Bible. The instruction I see in scripture is that I need to separate from you based on the fact that you are claiming to be Christian yet walking in darkness. (She is the one who friended this man, why friend him when you are already aware of who he is and what he stands for?) Please come back to the truth. You are in a very dangerous place. Hebrews 6 has some very serious warnings for you to consider.

(My loving brother's wife.)"

Really, what a bitch she is. Why bother sending me a note, if I am following a false Jesus? Aren't I lost already?

Facebook Friending Does NOT Mean you are ......

Facebook has become a new obsession for me. I am not a phone caller, and much prefer writing to keep up with my friends. I have family on Facebook, many of whom are on my friend list.

But, what is up with these family member who don't respond to my friend request? How stupid is it to have everyone in the family on my friend list except one person? Yes, this is a rant, but really. I can handle the fact my right wing fundies in the family object to the me of me. I object to the them of them. But does this mean we can't keep up with birthdays, graduations, milestones in life?

The only request I never accepted was someone I'd never heard of who must have thought everyone with my last name wanted his totally right wing, republican ass, fundamentalist person as his friend.

***Grumping****

I will be nice, I will take the higher path, I will save my ranting for my anonymous blog.

Take that, you tight ass family members!

My Son - Caught Between Kid and Teen

My son is moody. One minute Hermes is my loving little son. The next a prickly little cactus. Tonight he's mad because I said he could have ice cream. My partner said no, because it is too late and the tween-ager won't be able to sleep. So he started crying.

I remember being an emotional kid. I felt so much all the time, like sensory overload. I used to resent my mom because she seemed unhappy all the time. Now I realize I am more like this son than I care to admit. I feel sorry for my mom because I must have been a pain in the ass much of my tween years.

What's More Important - Our Life Now or Our Afterlife Later?

Anytime I have overexposure to my family of original I am bombarded by memories of my past and an overwhelming feeling of life repeating itself. What I learned then is still envogue. Repeated and revered by today's young.


Take for example the idea of heaven. I was raised to believe heaven awaited only those who had a definite moment of conversion. Where they committed their life to Jesus and clung to this date as proof they'd be ensured a future after-life mansion. A relative talks about this fact in their blog, where its clearly stated "I believe salvation buys us a home in heaven filled with delights. To not accept Jesus as your savior guarantees death and eternal damnation."


OK, I think, I will accept Jesus because who doesn't want a home in heaven? But its not that simple. I often hear or see the phrase "I believe (so and so) is really saved." Like, now that one person has accepted Christ, they naturally have gained a truth magnifying glass and can tell when someone is faking conversion.

The conversion experience must be matched with a life lived by clear, scriptural principles. (The guidebook Bible says so, literally interpretating a book barely reflecting original manuscripts with authors named who didn't themselves write the books and traditions such as stoning, multiple wives, and murdering nations.) So by believing in literal translation, we know certain things.

Like heaven, the place this conversion guarantees. We aren't supposed to have solid bodies, frail human frames which give way to suffering and eventual death. Our revised selves will walk gold paved streets leading to our new homes. We do good here, we have a great place in the afterlife, complete with maid service, many rooms, and an olympic sized pool. We don't. we end up in a roach filled apartment which smells of fried foot odor.

The problem I've experienced with those who claim a great heaven for good works is questionable motivation. If I do X & Y I will have a great place to stay with God. If I only do 1/2 of X I will have a so-so place to stay in heaven. So what's the motivation here? Seems selfish.
Not to cast stones, but I've met folks claiming Christian status who seem to act as if they've been saved and don't care to do good now. They've got their pass and they're going to ride it to the end, roach motel or not.

I think to live life as if no afterlife (good or bad) existed is a better choice. A motivation to improve THIS life one of greater impact. To help ease another's suffering by listening. To use one's talent to build low-income housing. To mentor a teen who's struggling with drug and alcohol use. Isn't an immediate impact here and now better than a life-after-death bonanza?

Sure, we could say "what's the point" and go crawl in a hole and starve ourselves to death. We could do nothing. Or choose to do as much damage as possible before we end in blankness. We could choose this option knowing we were saved but not caring. We want the roach motel, right? But isn't that a version of hell? Being a miserable bastard who cares nothing for no one? Who is lonely and not cared for? Who wrecks everything and everyone they touch?

I choose to live for doing good now and the rest will fall into place. As for the whole conversion process, I believe we have a lifetime of acting like Jesus in service to others, finding riches in the smiles and impact we leave behind. Not a momentary flash of Jesus-ness followed by banking on eternal riches.

Church Sales & Community Sales - The Must-Attend Events of the Season

I love garage sales. The thrill of the hunt, the quest for the best for less. Garage sales are great, but the real finds are at church, community sales (clubs and community centers), and large "everyone in the neighborhood participates" sales.

Last year I wasn't on my game for the summer (no energy for the hunt) and fell short when it came to fall clothes for the kids. This year, I've already started stockpiling for the fall.

A local church had a three-day sale with the last day $3 for all you can fit in a bag. For $9, I have around 45 pieces of clothing fitting two boys and our girl. Depending on the suburb, you can find NICE barely worn name items for cheap! Yes this sounds classist, but really, who buys their kids so many Abercrombe, Old Navy, Gymboree, etc. clothes that they are barely worn? And who cares, if my kids end up as beneficiaries of their excess?

We also went to a local "Friends with Benefits", no, that doesn't sound right, "Friends who Care", or whatever community center consignment sale. Consignment in this case means the sellers had a say in pricing the item, with hopes of selling and getting back 70%. Seeing as the sale was advertised as a "mothers and babies" sale, they didn't tap into the market of school age parents seeking good deals. A small rack for school age and few buyers means I bought clothes for the boys, brands like FUBAR and Abercrombe for $8-10 each. Jeans they can wear in the fall or for dress this summer, nicer than anything we'd ever buy. Tomorrow is 50% off day, so back in the morning to pick up the rest of the jeans if they're still available.

I believe these sales give back to the community. Parents on tight budgets, who have many kids, or who are just plain frugal can get nice clothes at huge discounts. Sometimes the clothes still have tags (see my note on wealthier suburbs and their sales). Mainly, our kids can stay in style without breaking our banks.

Hears to hoping they never gain fear of wearing used clothes!

Moving on.....

I called and left a message for my parent who had a birthday today. My partner asked me why I bothered to call.

Resentment is a heavy burden. I don't have the energy to focus on my relationship with them more than required. My life is too full and my brain doesn't need anything else to occupy it.

Taking a higher path? Being a better person? No, just making a choice.

What I am Reading - Bright Shiny Morning

I think some books are better listened to than read. Critics have mixed reviews on the book, citing the many voices and characters confusing, interesting, whatever. I like the book, because despite the many parallel stories and historical data, the narrator's voice and inflection make the story fascinating. (Ben Foster is the narrator.)

I haven't been able to stop listening since I started three days ago.

Should I be Surprised when They do What They Do

The kids will be baptized on Sunday. My partner's parents are coming in town and her father will take part in the ceremony. I invited my parents to the service and to a picnic afterward. My mother called back and said "they would not be coming on Sunday". She thought she should let me know.

The little voice in my head wants to yell "She still doesn't think you are good enough!" But I cannot listen because I'll become absorbed in my past.

My parents do not approve of baptizing children. The do not approve of the church we go to. They do not approve of our lesbian relationship. They do not approve, do not approve, do not approve.

So what's new?

Letter to XXXXX

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I'm survived a birthday

I turned 48 last week. I cried in the morning because my partner forgot to say "Happy Birthday" in the morning. Cried some more after the kids went to school. Was supposed to meet my partner and friends for lunch and canceled. Went back to bed and slept most of the day.

People remembered. I did get birthday wishes from my partner's parents, my parents, my two brothers and their wives. One brother said nothing, which is typical.

Next year I will just plan the day in bed with no outside contact. Wallow in my self-pity and get over it so I can move on. I am nearing a half century of living. Wow,